The Google Meme

• Lili needs pins and numbers.
  
• Lili looks like she's driving an invisible car.
• Lili says that he has robust eyebrows, just like her father's.
• Lili wants the banana cake.
• Lili does not drink, no longer smokes, would like to have children some day, and considers herself a non-radical feminist.
• Lili hates the dog that shakes its head. She has now ripped its head off.
• Lili asks Jack to teach her rabbit. [Legend reference ftw!]
• Lili likes to dig.
• Lili eats every two hours, we are sending you news of our tumultuous day yesterday.
• Lili wears her harness with pride and that "she thinks it's her swimsuit as she proudly wears it to the beach.
• Lili was arrested for practicing Falun Gong exercises with other.
• Lili loves the rain.
• 
  

(Here is John Green's original version and also Hank's video version. Facilitated by the Nerdfighters Meme Generator)

Happiness Engines

I'm in Sydney at the ALIA Info Online conference, listening to lots of papers about the role of libraries and technology and how those roles are changing.

On of the presenters, Liz Lawley, talked about libraries as Happiness Engines. Apparently there are four elements of happiness:

1. Satisfying work to do

2. The experience of being good at something

3. Time spent with people we like

4. The chance to be part of something bigger than yourself.

I really like that list. I like that it has nothing to do with money, or status, or owning things. And I like that I can tick every box.

The other thing I really liked about Liz's presentation was the idea of doing Wii bowling for seniors at public libraries. And organising live tournaments online between different libraries. Unreal.

Mondegreens

I love a good mondegreen.

For those who are not familiar with the term, it was invented by US writer Sylvia Wright, who had misheard a 17th century ballad. The final two lines of a verse were:

They hae slain the Earl Amurray,

And laid him on the green.

Sylvia thought it was

They hae slain the Earl Amurray,

And Lady Mondegreen.

Other famous mondegreens include Excuse me while I kiss this guy, and There's a bathroom on the right.

My first mondegreen:

Tis the season to be Charley [jolly].

You can blame my Disney Christmas tape for that.

My most recent mondegreen:

Lips parted like a fraggle unfurled [a flag all unfurled]

From The Decemberists' Summersong.

My favourite mondegreens:

Our land abounds in nature strips [nature's gifts]

-Australian National Anthem

Hold me closer Tony Danza [tiny dancer]

-Tiny Dancer, Elton John

You'd think that I could rustle up a little soft-shoe Dennis Quaid [gentle sway]

-I Don't Feel Like Dancing, Scissorsisters

What are yours?

Cybils!

The Cybils Finalists are out, and I am getting my read on. The YA finalists are:

Audrey, Wait! by Robin Benway

Ten Cents a Dance by Christine Fletcher

The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks by E. Lockhart

Jellicoe Road by Melina Marchetta

Sweethearts by Sara Zarr

I Know It's Over by C.K. Kelly Martin

Thaw by Monica M. Roe

So far I've only read Frankie Landau-Banks and Jellicoe Road (known as On the Jellicoe Road here in Oz), and will blog about them presently...

My fellow YA judges are Jackie Parker, Sarah Stevenson, Little Willow and Casey Titschinger. The winners in all categories will be announced February 14th.

You can read about the Cybils, and see the finalists in all categories, here.

Happy New Year

I am returned from Phili Byland, where much food and drink was consumed, games were played, films were watched, books were read, and bracingly-cold swims were taken. Now I am all invigorated for 2009!

I'm looking forward to:

• the publication of Pink and Angelfish this year
  
• a UK trip which will include seeing Snazzy in Cardiff, going to a Diana Wynne Jones conference in Bristol, and the Edinburgh Book Festival
• Reading Matters 09 
• getting my quota of slashy lols in Merlin
• good books, good cheese, good wine, good TV, good friends.

I have no New Year's Resolutions, just Epic Plans.

Merry Christmas!

So this year I'm trying to save polar bears, and have therefore made all my Christmas presents.

Beekeeper mittens for Dad:
A Celestial Dragon for Mum:A Stagecrew Scarf for Jen:
A Bicycle Scarf for my KK:
Knee-warmers for my arthritic Grandma:
And mince pies, honey, honeycomb and gingerbread for many other peoples...

Merry Christmas! Peace on Earth, Goodwill to all, etc.

Mince Pies

Another of our family Christmas rituals is making the mince pies. Mum has talked a bit about this on her blog, and here is the recipe, with illustrations.

(makes two dozen)

the mince

100g currants

100g raisins

100g sultanas

50g dates, chopped

50g slivered or flaked almonds

1 ripe banana

4 tsp brandy

1/2 tsp ginger

1/2 tsp nutmeg

1/2 tsp mixed spice

1/2 tsp cinnamon

50g candied peel

juice and rind of 1 lemon

Mix it all together. (complicated, huh?)
Every member of the family has to have a stir:

Well, almost every member:
the pastry

450g self raising flour

225g grated butter

pinch salt

1 large egg

50g soft brown sugar

milk to mix

Mix flour and salt, rub in grated butter, stir in sugar. Make a hollow, and put in the slightly beaten egg with a tbsp of milk. Mix to make a pliable dough, then roll out onto a floured surface to .5cm thickness.

Cut out round circles for the bottom and either lids or stars for the tops, and use the bottom circles to line a greased tart or mini-muffin tray.
Add mince and tops:

Bake at 200 degrees celsius for 13 mins in a fan-forced oven, or 20 mins in a normal oven. Dust with icing sugar when cool:
Om nom nom, etc:

Preeeeettty

This Is Where We Live from 4th Estate on Vimeo.

Believing

(the following post is inspired by this utterly beautiful piece by Libba Bray)

(also, if you're under the age of, say, 10, I wouldn't read on if I were you)

When I was six or seven, I walked in on my Mum in the shower (in, like, March), and demanded that she tell me the truth, once and for all. Was there really a Father Christmas?

Mum said later on that she wasn't going to lie to me. She'd pretend along with me, but she wasn't going to lie. So she told me the truth.

And I was sad, but not particularly shocked. I mean, it's not like it was a particularly plausible thing, and old guy on a sleigh delivering presents.

The next year, Mum was in China over Christmas for her Uni course. I wrote Father Christmas a letter that said that I still believed in him anyway, and that I didn't really want anything for Christmas, but I wanted him to deliver a present to my mum, who was in China where they didn't have Christmas. This may have been the most adorable thing I ever did as a child.

I also remember finding a tooth in a little box in my parents' room. It was my first tooth (here is where I lost it). I confronted my parents, and they confessed.

Then, a while later, I was bragging to my babysitter about how I knew the truth about the Tooth Fairy and Father Christmas. She laughed and said "yeah, I remember when I found out about the Easter Bunny.' And I sort of lost my shit. The Easter Bunny was all I had left! Never mind that it was by far the least plausible of the gift-giving trinity of childhood. They took that away from me too.

Mum asked me the other day if I would do the Santa thing with my children, and I replied that of course I would. How could I deny my child the magic and excitement of Christmas? The reindeer, the elves - it's all happening up at the North Pole, and I loved to imagine it. Tolkein's Letters from Father Christmas is one of the most beautiful expressions of parental love I've ever seen.

I know the truth about Father Christmas now, but that doesn't stop me from getting that twinge of excitement at Christmastime. And I look forward to believing it all over again with baby H, and with my own kids one day.

Scrooges Beware

I really like Christmas.

Someone asked recently how I can justify getting my Yule on with so much enthusiasm, when I'm a proud, card-carrying member of the I-don't-believe-in-God Society. And I don't know if I can justify it, but I'm going to try anyway and if you're still confused you can go and ask Walt Whitman to explain.

I quite like the Christian Christmas story. The idea of a poor family denied any kind of welfare and having to give birth in a barn is appealing to a bleeding-heart lefty like me. And the bits about the star, and the wise men - awesome. The stuff good stories are made of. And it is a great story, whether I believe it really happened or not. Also, there are some great Christmas carols about it, and I do love to get a little bit carolly at this time of year.

But Christmas isn't about religion to me. Mum and I went to Midnight Mass one year in Adelaide (just for something to do), but it was really hot and there was standing room only and I fainted just before Communion.

So for me, Christmas is about family, friends, food, glittery things, fairy lights, gifts, and something else that is strange and magical, which I suppose some people call God but I prefer to think of as the entirely non-supernatural spirit of Christmas.

Anyway, I'm going to be blogging about some Christmassy things over the next couple of weeks, so Scrooges should probably go and count their lumps of coal until the 26th, because I'll be unashamedly soppy and full of cheer.

It's beginning to look a lot like...

Barbie + Amy Pohler + Smart Girls = Awesome

I've always appreciated Barbie. 

Barbie is the kind of woman who says 'Hey, girls! You can be a surgeon or a sign language teacher or a UN Ambassador or an astronaught or a paleontologist. And wear a nice hat and pretty shoes.' Barbie had careers. Barbie ran for President in 2000, long before Hillary or Palin came on the political scene. Barbie was never defined by her male partners. And Barbie showed us that deformity can be beautiful too. We don't judge Barbie for her scary legs or her twisted pointy feet.

Barbie is equal opportunity. She has black and Hispanic friends, as well as a friend with cerebral palsy, who gets around in a pink wheelchair. She cares about the environment, and about children's rights.

In the current billion-dollar lawsuit of Barbie vs Bratz, I am 100% on Barbie's side.

And now, Barbie's latest campaign is for the smart girl. She's launched a web TV show with Amy Pohler (of SNL fame), called Smart Girls At The Party. It's basically a show that celebrates smart girls - girls who write, read, play music and think. I highly recommend.

Thomas Henry Brain

I'd like you all to meet my great-great-grandfather, Thomas Henry Brain.

He lived around the corner from our family home in Clifton Hill, which is weird because neither of my parents even come from Victoria, let alone this area.

He was a brewer, and a travelling salesman. And a Freemason. From which we can infer that he liked drinking, secret handshakes, and cosplay.

Don't you think he looks like he's on his way to a sci-fi convention?

Christmas Pudding

Much like the Onions, I am loathe to do anything Christmassy until December 1. But there are some things that need to be thought about ahead of time, and puddings is one of them.

Making the Christmas Pudding(s) is a great tradition in the Wilkinson house. My mum and I do it together every year, about mid-November. I do the mixing (with my hands, in a bucket, because we make several), and Mum does the measuring.

We serve the pudding after Christmas lunch, on fire. It's incredibly impressive, and super nommy. And the secret - it's REALLY EASY to make.

The Wilkinson Family Pudding Recipe:
(makes 1 pudding that serves 6-8)

Mix:

225g currants
100g sultunas
100g raisins
100g peel
25g almonds

Then add:

100g plain flour (sifted)
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp ginger
1 1/2 tsp mixed spice
225g barbados sugar
100g breadcrumbs
225g grated butter

Then add:

rind and juice of 1 lemon
2 eggs
1 tbsp treacle
4 tbsp mixed milk and rum (half/half)

Then put it in a pudding-bowl, and slosh a little more rum over the top. Cover top with greaseproof paper and then foil, and secure with string.

Put the tied-up bowl in a large saucepan of water, and boil for 3-4 hours (refilling water as needed). Put in cupboard.

If you like, you can 'feed' it regularly with an extra slosh of rum, just to make it really deadly.

On Christmas Day, boil the pudding again (as above) for 3-4 hours. Make custard to serve.

To Flame: Put pudding on table and dim lights. Heat two tablespoons of rum in a metal ladle over a flame. Once the rum is hot, set the ladle alight and pour molten fire over your pudding. Pretty!

(photo by Snazzy)

Nice words

So Scatterheart was longlisted (but not shortlisted) for the Waterstones Children's Book Prize. Which I think is not a bad effort considering it won't even be published in the UK until early next year.

The lovely people at Waterstones had some excellent feedback about the book:

I loved this book!! I loved the convict/Australian story was superb and really enjoyed the fantasy tale running all the way through it. I thought the characters were complex, no two-dimmensional disney baddies with twirly moustaches here!

I enjoyed this book so much, that as soon as I had finished I wanted to share it with someone else, but also went straight on-line to see if it was available to buy from anywhere now. Want my own copy!!

Loved it! I thought the way that the tale of Scatterheart ran alongside the main story was great, the parallels were not too obvious but it did give the story a nice 'fairy-tale' feel. Great characters, great story - definately one for the shortlist!

A gritty (Celia Reesish ?) teen novel that somehow manages to be both intensely real, moving and compelling - but also manages to be this year's North Child. Or should that be South Child?

Sheer 'Quality'.

I loved this book, it really captured me.

With marvellous characters to love and hate and a capturing tale, this book will take you on a heartfelt journey.

Of what i have read so far to do with the prize this is my fave. adventure, love and characters you can't help but like.

I'll join in the praise! I thought it was a compelling read - especially on board the ship. I thought the characters were really well drawn and was terrified but fascinated by the way Hannah's life completely changed in a heartbeat. For me, 'Scatterheart' will be hard to beat!

Love, love, loved it! A real journey in physical and emotional terms. I think the ending was spot on, I won't ruin it, but hopeful without being unrealistic. Definitely for fans of Celia Rees' wonderful Witch Child.

I really enjoyed this book. The mixture of fairy tale and gritty history worked so well. I was enchanted by Hannah's journey all the way through (and polar bears are my favourite animal!) Definitely one for the shortlist.

This was a quality bit of storytelling and if anything is going to give 'Hunger Games' a run for its money - it's this. Proper period writing [literally], infectious characters [literally]...stop me someone please! Hey i just really enjoyed this and this has been another story set on a boat that's been great.

Keith Olbermann on Proposition 8

The Kids are Alright

You know the one age group of Californians who voted against Proposition 8?

CNN exit poll*

Vote by Age Yes No


18-29 39 61


30-44 55 45


45-64 54 46


65+ 61 39

Proposition 8, for those of you who might not know, was a proposed constitutional amendment that would make gay marriage illegal in California. It passed, being the one nasty small-minded smudge on what was otherwise a proud day for America.

But have a look at those numbers. The only group who voted No - voted against discrimination - was the young people.

Have a look at this map, sent to me by the wondrous Snazzy.

It's often easy to cry that the world is going to hell-in-the-proverbial, but sometimes it helps to take a step back. Yes, there is still sexism, homophobia, religious intolerance, religious fanaticism, poverty, discrimination, global warming and racism in the world. But we're getting better. Overall, long-term, things are getting better. And from what I see in the world, and what the data above suggests, is that, over time, we are becoming more open-minded, more unprejudiced, more understanding**.

Here, also from Snazzy, is a letter written by an eight-year-old Filipino-American girl to Barack Obama with some advice about a dog, and a request that he make a law that requires everyone to recycle, and also ban unnecessary wars***.

In Obama's response, he writes, "I want you to look up the word 'empathy' in the dictionary. I believe we don't have enough empathy in our world today, and it is up to your generation to change that... I hope you will always be an active participant in the world around you, and that you will seize every opportunity to make the world better. Seeing young people like you who care about making things better inspires me and gives me great hope about the future of our country."

In today's New York Times Op-Ed, Al Gore proposes to make all of the US's electricity renewable within 10 years. The article is passionate and practical, and I highly recommend you read it (especially you, Mr Rudd). But here is the bit that made me cry:

Looking ahead, I have great hope that we will have the courage to embrace the changes necessary to save our economy, our planet and ultimately ourselves.

In an earlier transformative era in American history, President John F. Kennedy challenged our nation to land a man on the moon within 10 years. Eight years and two months later, Neil Armstrong set foot on the lunar surface. The average age of the systems engineers cheering on Apollo 11 from the Houston control room that day was 26, which means that their average age when President Kennedy announced the challenge was 18.

This year similarly saw the rise of young Americans, whose enthusiasm electrified Barack Obama’s campaign. There is little doubt that this same group of energized youth will play an essential role in this project to secure our national future, once again turning seemingly impossible goals into inspiring success.

People often ask me why I write for teenagers. This is why.

______________________________

*Nicked from this post by Justine.

**I was going to say "more tolerant", but I've made a personal pledge to stop using that word. The dictionary tells me that "tolarate" means "to accept or endure something unpleasant or disliked with forbearance". It's a horrible thing to say (I'm looking at YOU, Palin).

***She is an Obama fan despite the fact that her parents are named John and Cindy. For serious.

Dear America: Yes You Did

So I've been following the US election pretty... obsessively. Like, REALLY obsessively.

And there are a few people who have been eyerolling me whenever I mention it. Because, after all, it isn't MY country. I didn't vote. It isn't MY president. Why should I care?

This is, of course, ridiculous.

I'm sick of people saying "they're all the same". I'm sick of people saying "one vote never made a difference". This is nonsense. Every vote makes a difference. And they are not the same.

I've got a lot more to say on this particular issue, but I'm very tired, so for now I'll just say - today was a good day to be alive. I'm off to bed with the knowledge that when I wake up tomorrow morning, the world will be a little bit better than it was this morning.

Tender Morsels

Reading one of Margo Lanagan's short stories is like running across sizzling tarmac and then plunging into a deep pool of clear, cold water. It's an enormous shock to the system, but it's wonderful. Except by the time you've acclimatised to the cold, you have to haul yourself out of the pool and sprint across the tarmac again before you can jump in the next pool and start all over again. It's an amazing experience, reading a book like Black Juice or Red Spikes. But it takes work.

So I admit I was a little nervous about Tender Morsels. I thought it would be hard work. I knew it would be beautiful - it's Margo, after all, and she is one of the greatest writers in Australia. But I thought it would be one of those books you had to push yourself through.

I was wrong.

Tender Morsels sucked me in from the opening sentence*, and kept me held tight until it rather cruelly spat me out at the end. It is gripping and sad and beautiful. The language is breathtakingly stunning. The characters are real and wonderful. It takes old and tired elements of fantasy - magic, medieval villages, wolves, bears** - and reinvents them, new, glittering, fascinating.

I cannot recommend it highly enough, even if (especially if) you are one of those frankly unenlightened people who thinks they don't like fantasy.

It's published here as an adult novel, in the US and UK as YA. I think it's both. It's crossover. There are... controversial bits.

Read more in this interview with Margo, which includes a lolsome fictional grilling from Jon Stewart/Stephen Colbert. Here's a sample:

Well, after Jon/Stephen had mentioned all Tender Morsels' sexual content and general weirdness and darkness, and waved the book around and asked "What is in the WATER down there in Australia, that your young people read this sort of story?," I would say:

"This book sits right on the upper edge of the YA category, and in fact in Australia it's fallen right off the fence and is published as an adult book. But, categories-schmategories, Jon/Stephen - this is just a story. I'm going for a sense of story that may be hardwired into us, or at least is laid down when we're very young, and never goes away. If you've ever enjoyed being creeped out by a campfire story, or enchanted by a fairy tale - or in fact if you've ever had an imaginary refuge that you go to in your head, a mountain cave or a sunlit forest glade - you'll like Tender Morsels. This story is the kind that pushes everyday life out of your head completely."

JON/STEPHEN: And replaces it with fornicating bears?

MARGO: Well, bears have gotta do what they gotta do, no? And I have it on good authority, from one grown-up female reader, that some of these bears are dead sexy. There's a lot of bad sex in this story, but the bears get some of the good stuff.

She's right. The bears are totally hot.

_____________________________

*For those of you who have read the book: yeah, that pun was intentional.

**The BEARS. Oh, Margo! The BEARS. I loved them so very much.

Spring Things

The splendiferous Brigid Lowry is in The Residence over at insideadog, and is encouraging a creative spring clean. And lists! I love lists.

Things That Would Make Me Happy

• a night at home eating chili and watching the West Wing
  
• a title for my crusades book
  
• an Obama presidency
  
• about 700 years to catch up on reading
  
• for Margo Lanagan's Tender Morsels to never end
  
• making all my Christmas presents this year
  

Things I am Prepared to do Without

• Australian Idol
  
• for that matter, television-on-television (DVDs is different)
  
• alcohol on weeknights
  
• books about dead girls in country towns
  
• the twelve political blogs I'm currently reading (i could prolly cut it down to eight)

Relax, Trust, Surrender.